Journal: Home

Most of my life I have lived a life of chaos searching for something or some kind of fulfillment. Physical, emotional or chemical means were futile attempts to fill the void within me. Feelings of satisfaction were mostly short lived eventually leading towards social dissatisfaction. 

Meditation helped me to get used to solitude. Meditation also allowed that which I was searching for to come to me. Moments of bliss and contentment were without any known attachment. Those feelings were familiar to me and I wanted more. 

My recent paradigm shift toward a conscious simulation, or shared dream has fostered an evolution or expansion of consciousness. This conscious dream now guides me toward understanding what I have been searching for. 

Contentment, bliss and joy are my natural states of being. My dissatisfaction was an indication that I was lost. Now that I am aware that my emotional responcses can be used to guide me, I can find my way back to the source of consciousness that is my true home. 

I now know why I have never felt at home at any single time in my life. The closest place to home has always been on a mountain or deserted beach, but now I can summon that feeling of home, bliss and relief with a thought. I have finally realized that I am a conscious being in the midst of the whole of consciousness, how much closer to home can I be? This is what I have been searching for, a way back home, right here, right now.

The sleeper has finally awakened...